U.S.—After state governments across the country directed their citizens to shut down their businesses and just kinda hope things worked out, a new order has been issued: everyone is to jump off a bridge immediately.
A government official issued the order to solve our current crisis, and everyone immediately complied.”Everyone jump off a bridge,” said a representative of the government.
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The directive was designed to end coronavirus. Medical experts believe it’s the best, most effective way to stop the virus. Assuming everyone follows through and obeys the order, coronavirus will be wiped out, according to officials. There are no bad side effects, as far as anyone can tell. A few people pointed out that it could kill everyone, but these people are anti-science and obviously hate their neighbors.
Source: Everyone Jumps Off Bridge After New Government Order Telling Everyone To Jump Off Bridge | The Babylon Bee
A NOTE FROM THE BISHOP:
It would seem that there are many Americans who are unaware that THE BABYLON BEE is a satirical website that often pokes fun at American culture. Even the so called fact checker websites have fallen victim to “The Bee” and labeled posts — that were intended to be satirical and in the name of humor–to be “fake news.”
With that said, many across the nation are questioning “why did we let the powers that be, convince us to metaphorically “jump off a bridge?”